Hypothermia
by CaideSin
Summary: It's a cozy little Robin pile. [I to IV] [gen, crack]


Steph can't stop laughing. 

Her breasts are heaving and Jason is leering and Dick is covering one half of his face trying not to laugh too.

He's smiling. The corner of his mouth is pulled up and...smiling.

And Tim...Tim is pointedly not paying attention to any of them.

"This sucks."

Steph has officially progressed to giggling. Her arms are crossed under her breasts, cradling her aching ribs.

It's insipid.

"I wouldn't say sucks, unless you're offering."

"Jason!"

And...Tim isn't. He's not. Looking. Or. Noticing. No.

"Chill out, big bird."

Steph won't stop laughing.

Her nipples are...pert. That is the word Tim is definitely not thinking of.

They are (not) pert because it is really ridiculously cold.

And...he (does not) glances at Jason, closest on his right.

His skin is raised in gooseflesh as well.

But they've all been trained for this.

They can sit here in the cold until kingdom come.

But..the...

"Come on!" Steph is just...just dying. "This is..." She breaks off as her lips compress and her laughter takes over once more.

"B won't..."

"Won't what, big bird?" Jason taunts. He goes back to leering at Steph immediately afterwards and Tim...Tim has the least body fat of them all.

He's cold and not looking at them.

Because Jason's calves are really kind of ripped and Dick's thighs are really kind of perfectly toned and Steph is...her nipples are pert.

"He'll get us out, Jay."

Steph laughs. She laughs for nearly an hour and just when it begins to die away, it starts up again because taking this situation quietly is not an option.

"So Freeze is a closet pervert!" She cackles.

And Tim...Tim thinks about Nora and just...no. They don't know who is behind this, but when he finds out? He's going to kill them for putting him in this kind of situation because he isn't good...at...at this. With dealing. With this.

"O hasn't lost track of us," he mumbles.

Jason sneers at him and Tim finds that easier to take than his leering at Steph.

"Yeah, I'm sure she hasn't lost track of her anal probe boy."

And...Tim has to wonder which of them he means because he would love to assume it's Dick but...

"Jason," Dick says and tries to pretend he's annoyed but it comes out as if he's thinking the same thing Tim is.

Steph just keeps laughing.

She laughs for hours.

They all know it's been hours.

Another bit of Bat training. Internal clocks.

And it's really getting cold and...Batman would want them...he would expect them to put survival above protecting their decency but cuddling up against Hood is the last thing he wants to do.

Especially when Steph and her...Yes. Would be involved in the equation as well.

But as hours pass...

"We all know he's not coming."

"Jason!"

"Can you say anything else, big bird?"

And Tim isn't noting that he had been thinking exactly the same thing.

Steph diffuses the whole thing with her laughing and crawling over and wedging her perfectly wonderful, round hips right up against Tim's and...He wants to ask if they're still not dating, but doesn't want to have that conversation in front of Nightwing and he wishes she would be just a little more bitter right now so he would feel more vindicated.

"Robin pile!"

Tim half hopes that Dick will make himself a buffer between Hood and Steph and he does, but Hood decides if he can't have that little bird he'll take the other and...

Tim doesn't stare up at him as those really very ripped calves press up against his own.

"Isn't this cozy?"

Steph is laughing again, her smooth thigh rubbing against his with every joyful wrack of her body.

Batman comes for them, hours later.

Looks at them.

Cold and naked and huddled together because they'd tried escaping during one of the earlier sets of 'many hours' but there's only so much one can do when one is naked and trapped inside a big concrete cube.

Batman gives his cape to Steph, which sets her laughing again.

And she hands it off to Tim.

Jason is leering and snickering between his teeth.

And Dick has half his face cradled in one hand.

Trying not to smile.

* * *

END

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**Standard Disclaimers  
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